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Wednesday, August 11, 2010

The long and short of it and A question to the readers

Today's topic. Hair. My hair. The length, the color....So as you all may know, or not LOL , I was growing my hair out. I had a deal with my partner in crime , daughter Rebecca. I made it for many months I did, I really did. Not even a trim. I got to this point ....
and I liked it, but it was A LOT of work. So many products, blow drying, flat irons ...a lot of time and effort!!! It was hard cause I have all the chronic pain issues and so my arms would ache and throb to just have my hair look decent, it would last one day, then it was pony and clip time. With the pain issues, bands and clips made my head ache. 

I agree, I like myself in long hair when it would look good...we all know not every day is a great , or even good hair day and I had more bad than good. But I was determined, and for a time it was easier and cheaper to let it grow. I was getting compliments, and told I looked younger, even though the longer it got , the older I felt...weird since when I was younger I hair well past my shoulders, almost to the middle of my back, and thought I looked young. So maybe it was the fact that the longer it got, the more gray I saw. It is hard to see in the pics, but it is there. 

The other factor, over the last 4 years my hair has become thinner and thinner. The texture has changed. I once had ringlets, where only slightly wavy hair existed, I use to have very course hair, where only medium to fine now is what I live with. I used to have body, where only limp now happens, unless I use a lot of hair spray and other various tricks. Age , health, stress, all has done a number on my hair and how it looks and feels. 

Like I said I have had long hair, as well as long hair over the years...heck just over the last nearly three years... This is just a sample...starting with a very short, butch like pixie with long bangs....
A very short, tight bob, then pinned up on the sides and a bit fuller...with help of hairspray.... Then a thicker, layered bob..before my hair really began to thin out as it has in the last year from stress.... A bit longer, and one of my fav lengths, but more work.... Then I stopped coloring this past year and the gray began to show, hair was still thicker here and had some natural body and wave... I tried this bob out for awhile, but it made my face look too round at this length and I soon abandoned it for the flip show at the top of the page.
  Then I got tired of it, and got it cut to a long layered look..... it was ok, but a one trick pony , and not that much different.
Then went a couple weeks later for an A line....

It too was ok, but I felt a bit old in it and it did not seem like the same bob I had last year when growing my hair I went for another version....
I LOVED this, I did, i felt great, I felt hip and I felt sexy...BUT when I would walk, I would get "bat wings" I have those on my arms, did not need my hair to do that, and well it had to be flat ironed daily, sometimes more than once...can we say sizzzle! SO , I went the next week and got the wings cut off, much to the ridicule and questioning from certain people in my life....

 But I was not 100% was still a lot of work, and so I decided to go get a cut like I had a few years ago when I lived in Texas....

 I went to the stylist, armed with this picture of myself...and she said "sure , you are close, just a bit of texture needed to be added...a bit of shaping..." So I let her go to work...she had just 5 weeks ago given me the first major cut, the A line that re-started me cutting my hair after over a year of not, so I closed my eyes and let her go to work. When she was done directing my head, and snipping , I opened my eyes and ran my hand through it and it "seemed" long enough to get it to do what I wanted it to when I would get home to blow dry and touch up the style ( my hair never "plumps up" when wet) . I asked her to add some texture to my bangs...closed my eyes yet again to avoid the hair getting in them...she was just supposed to add a bit of un- even ends /lengths like in the photo....when I got home and washed my hair, and went about styling it I discovered instead I had a long section of bangs, a giant hole of mini , baby jagged points and then a bigger long section band of bangs ...I was horrified...where was my bangs??? They had been the perfect length and even in the salon it did not appear that she had hacked them , but then she had them brushed to the side. Too late now!!! 

I went about creating angled bangs, even needing to trim what little was left of the original length to make them look decent...and I started to try to style my hair , get the air from the blow dryer to pump up the roots and create the above look that I had been so excited to have back, as it was one I always LOVED on me. The length was there in places, not in others. I could not get it to do what needed to be done.....I do not know if she thinned it too much, put too many layers, too much texture....I just do not know...but this is my hair now...

 I do not hate it. You know from the other pics I have had really short hair...heck at one a few points in my life I had almost a buzz cut! I will give it this, it is wash and need to use products, no need to blow dry and well I could flat iron the bangs so they appear a bit longer, but over the last few days I have decided to just scrunch and go. Work with my natural wave , and let it do what it wants, go where it wants, lay the way it wants. It is hair, it will grow....might take two to three months to get my bangs back and a bit more volume, but it is perfect in so many ways for what is left of Summer....OK yeah I am justifying , trying to make myself 100% adore just takes some getting used to. 

I have caught a bit of grief from daughter Rebecca for getting my hair cut so many times since Mother's day , spending at so many strip mall salons what if saved up would have afforded me a high end place that might have gotten it right the first time...I am aware that it became an OCD thing, I was obsessed...I get that way. I know I do. Either I have to abstain from cutting my hair at all or I get it cut too often and well a pixie happens. YES, this has happened before. I think it is a way for me to have control ( a falsehood) over something in my life when I have nothing else in my life to control...but that is better saved for another blog...let's just say there is major changes happening in my life, YET AGAIN and so this was my way of coping. Funny how we do that isn't it??? That is NOT the question mentioned in the title.

THIS is the question.....What are your feelings on gray hair??? Many say I am too young....many love it, many have no opinion. I am on the fence, I flip flop hour to hour and day to day!!!! I gave up coloring about the same time our world went upside down and I KNEW we would be moving to an apartment....the cost, the mess, the risk of getting the coloring on something in a rental ( thought that did not stop my youngest daughter!!) with my pain issues, it was tough to do for myself. Rebecca loves it. The other two daughters do not mind. My husband says it is only fair. My Mother was envious that I had a choice as my Dad has always wanted her to keep her hair colored. I have friends that rave about it and others that keep silent or are just too polite. 

 I on often occasion feel it makes me feel old...not like me or the me that I fight to keep a hold of despite my life and my health.  I think there are women that can rock it.....
KristenMcMenamy for one...she is my age , actually I think one year younger and she ROCKS it ...but hers is solid "silver" , mine is more salt and pepper... Jamie Lee Curtis has been gray/silver/salt and pepper for years and she looks great....  Heck we now even have a similar hair style! She does have a bit more of the silver/salt than I do...give me time....
But like I said ...there are days....I am at times even jealous of my avatar! Her white is just light reflections....

So here is the BIG question...I wanna know, and have your truthful input! On the color or not to color question...even on the hair it , hate it , keep it, grow it again, a little or a lot.....was going to make a poll, but I am computer challenged so skipped it and will just let you leave comments....please do!!! I will be reading...and responding too!


  1. My dear fret far too much because your hair looks great! :) I'm jealous (and you probably are of me) because my hair is so curly that I just give up! When I try to straighten it I end up with I just try products that enhance my natural curl, tame the frizz, and help me deal with it. It's pretty boring! (Not to mention, Steven won't let me cut it...but it's probably good cause I'd have a REAL fro if I had it any shorter)

    As for color... I love experiementing with different ones...that's the fun part. But that costs money and is certainly a risk! But as for your question, the natural look works for you! Maybe it's because I know you but you have such a pizzaz in your own right, that the grey doesn't at all come off as "old". You can certainly ROCK it! :)

  2. Okay, my dear can wear your hair so many different ways and it looks good!! I like the short hair with the bangs a little longer..the pic of you with white blouse and the highlighting in your hair is a great cut for you...IMO! Basically, it sounds as if you want the bangs longer and gee, that doesn't take long!! But, you're cute as a button no matter!

    As for the color...totally up to you! Do you like the silver/gray in your hair? Easily rectified even with highlighting if you're not sure yet and don't want to totally color your hair! I think it looks fine, but YOU have to be comfortable. I don't know if I've helped any, but if there is something more you want to ask, just holler!

  3. I like it the way you have it, and when you have the pixy cut. :)
    And, COLOR if you want too! I color. Cuz it's so easy to change when you want. I cut and color my hair all the time. LOL Maybe that's why it's falling out?? JUST KIDDING. Sorta.

  4. Well being the sister of a high end stylist I have to scold you and agree with your daughter haha. You should have saved the money and gone to a reputable salon. I myself am not a fan of strait lines. I like layers and volume. I know you say it's a lot of work for you but I don't think the Jamie Lee Curtis do would be too much trouble and I love her cut by the way! I'm sorry your bangs didn't turn out but you are right, they will grow. And then you need to save the money and go to a nice salon and tell them you want Jamie's hair lol.

    Gray.... I love men with all shades of gray. Yum lol. Women, not so much. Are there women who can pull it off? Certainly, but not many imo. I would have to really see you with the gray to be able to tell yay or nay and I can't see it in the pictures.

  5. Ok. I have the same hair. Thin and fine. I have even done the buzz cut but that was by accident last year...snicker. I am trying to grow it out again. We will see. As to letting it go natural?? I started graying at 18 and I will be 50 in November. My oldest sister has such beautiful white hair...pure silver/white. So I thought what the heck I'm going to do that, see if mine looks as pretty as hers does. I cut off all of the colored part...mostly silver with a touch of the dark brown. I liked it, but you seem to have my coloring as well. Honestly honey...I looked washed out. It was way to pale for my skin. see my husband is 9 years younger than I am. Now he didn't mind the gray, likes it better colored but as he always says he loves me no matter what.
    Tere is the deal...TWICE that week I was asked if Mark was my....wait for it....SON! Oh yes they did! LOL! And I have a hard time getting people to believe that I am almost 50.
    That my sweet was the deciding factor! LOL!
    Having gray hair ages you no matter what, it just does. It is a fact of life, and a fact of society. Good on Kristen for wanting to go natural but lets be honest. She looks like hell in that photo. Brave? Yep. But old, washed out and tired.
    So I think you look great with the color that you have. It fits you. Even if you tried say blonde it would be way to pale for your coloring. know I dig funky cuts and Vintage look baby! HUGZ!

  6. Thank you for your friendship and compassion regarding the illness. It's truly appreciated.

    At 27 I have gray streaks in my nearly black hair, which I hate on myself at my age. I do not think gray on other women looks bad.

    Don't worry about your hair, it'll grow back; loved the trendy look and it looks wonderful as it's what's in your heart that matters. Not on your head but in your head :)

  7. Of course you know I like the grey, I think it looks really nice! I think the hair is all about if you 'rock it' or not .Confidence can make or break it.

    There are so many days that I wish to cut all my hair off and go super short. I do not think a pixie really fits me anymore, and for that I am jealous of how well you and angel can pull it off.

  8. You look great either way! I personally love the short you currently have!

    and I say color only if you want to not because you feel you have to :)

  9. I say go for it when it comes to color! I haven't seen my natural hair color in ions.

    Love the pixie cut on you....I wish I could pull that off.

  10. Ruby, I LOVE LOVE LOVE the cut that gave you "bat wings" but I also think you look adorable in this last photo with the headband. Either way I think you rock short hair! I'm not such a fan of your favorite cut from Texas- my honest opinion is that one ages you more than any grey hair possible could. I think Jamie lee Curtis looks gorgeous with the salt and pepper. I am way to vain to sport it myself. ;)


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